Or another subtitle...
What the hell, I'm too young to be having a midlife crisis!!
I think it was this thought that kept me from embracing the possibility of the midlife crisis. And while this diagnosis might not be the answer to everything, I do think identifying it as something gave me the power to move forward in fixing things that were wrong and not working for me.
The title made it a thing and not a phantom.
I believe this milestone or season can happen at any age AND will be a recurring experience, especially considering the criteria I outlined previously
wanting to feel different about yourself and your life
following any season of being settled; in one job, parenthood, in a relationship for longer than a fairytale
allowing shame and other feelings to keep you squelched
If you're thinking, oh hell no! I don't wanna go through this kind of season again… Hear me out!
When you embrace the fact that you are an evolutionarily being, constantly evolving and developing and changing,
AND
fully embrace that there is no shame in wanting change,
then this or any season doesn't have to be a crisis.
When this season and shakeup happened in my life, I really was at what could be considered “mid life“, but this experience certainly happens at any age and stage. I imagine I'll go through another turning point soon enough.
I wish we could find a different title for the diagnosis. As a therapist, I am certain that putting language around an experience helps you identify the needs and the course of action clearer and quicker. And seeing as how I would never have identified with midlife, nor the midlife crisis, I think I stayed in that state of crisis longer than what I would have had I had the understanding sooner.
And that’s why I write. I hope it helps. I hope it helps someone who doesn’t understand what they might be going through, sooner. So they can commence the reconstruction sooner. To live life more fully, now.
1 Comment